Blessings In Disguise

Don't be fooled by the dark clouds or the random down pours of rain.  Hidden up there between it all is an amazing blessing just waiting for it's chance to shine through.  Some might complain that we haven't had summer weather yet.  Some might be tired of the six nights of storms that have continued to bust through our area.  But, we haven't had any flooding in our area (other areas are not so lucky), our flowers are in full bloom, the grass is as green as green could be (without an ounce of our own water) and then tonight there was a miracle.  It was not just an ordinary rainbow that blessed our community ... it was the brightest, fullest, double-rainbow I have ever seen.

The kids had just finished their showers.  Two of them were still in towels.  I yelled for them all to come.  We stepped out on the deck and for about five minutes, we all just watched in awe.  There were comments about, "how happy the Leprechauns must be," and about "how much gold there must be since there were TWO rainbows."  Rain sprinkled down on us and smiles spread widely across all our faces.

You might think I have a spoiler alert now to share.  That's what I usually do; spoil the amazing stories with a mood-crashing event.  Really the only thing that happened was my son getting so excited he pulled his towel wide open and flashed the world.  This only made my smile grow bigger.  Chuckles came from everyone on our deck and probably other houses that witnessed the event.  But, tonight there was nothing to spoil our 'rainbow moment'.

Summer has only been here for three days.  We have had some unusual weather patterns.  We have had some adjustments to all being home together.  We have had plenty of 'it's okay' moments already.  Tonight on the deck, though, there was sheer excitement for the joy of Mother Nature.  There were no mean words shared, no sibling-rivalry, no thrown toys or awful looks.  There was a memory in the making!

Tomorrow we head out on a short vacation.  We get to celebrate love at a wedding, we get to celebrate success at a graduation party, we get to explore the amazing Mall of America.  But, I'm sure the memory in the making will take place in the ... you guessed it ... HOTEL POOL!  We will have struggling moments.  We will find that 'getting there ISN'T half the fun'!  But, again, there will be plenty of blessings in disguise.  It's just up to me to find them all!

Here's to you finding a blessing hiding in your life.  It will pop out when you least expect.  Be ready so you don't miss the joyful 'rainbow moment' it has to offer.  

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'.

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Change Is Hard On Everyone

There is one thing you can count on in life and that is that nothing ever stays the same.  People grow, communities change, goals shift and season after season no weather pattern is consistent.  Just when you have a good life sync, something happens; something changes.  That is totally life.  And some times, it totally stinks.

Changes sometimes create amazing opportunities or new chances.  But, even with the wonder and marvel of grand new things, the change that occurs creates stress on everyone involved.  Some people are blessed with a strength for being flexible and adaptable.  This isn't the case for most of the human population; including me!

Summer is upon us.  School is out!  The pool is open.  Life is wonderful ... right?  Well, all this change is excellent, but it is also hard to deal with.  Routines are no longer consistent, bed time is no longer dark, mornings are lazy.  Again, this can be wonderful, but it can also be a challenge that kids and parents aren't quite ready for.

Why is that when we are crazy busy, all we want is some down time.  Then, as soon as the down time hits, we want to busy again?  Why is there no happy-medium?  We will be sick and tired of rushing and always entertaining people and then as soon as there is a free day or a free evening, we feel all alone.  Human emotions are so strange.

Whatever change you may be dealing with, I can only imagine that it is at least a tiny bit stressful.  I'm going to encourage you (well, okay, I'm going to encourage myself) to take it all in stride.  Try to find some things that remain consistent.  Try not to let the moments of shifted routines or down time overwhelm you.  Find a new hobby or a healthy habit.  Remind yourself that 'it's okay' moments will happen more often in the face of change.  These moments may leave you doubting yourself or the opportunities small changes can create.  Take on each day with as much force as you can muster.  

I got some looks today as I forced our four children out the door.  First looks came at the bank.  Each of my four children got to 'cash in' their change and dollars for bigger bills.  We are heading to MN for a wedding and they are excited to spend some money at the Mall of America.  While it's wonderful they had this opportunity, the five people in line behind us did not welcome the time it takes to cash out four small children.  We then headed to the YMCA.  This went off without a hitch; my kids to daycare and me to a workout class.  Unfortunately the hitch broke when I couldn't find my keys as we were trying to leave.  I walked with my two-year-old through a yoga class, only to unsuccessfully not find my lost keys.  The silver lining ... I had a spare.

Then to Wal-Mart.  Need I say more?  Plus we got stuck in line behind some cashier trouble and me and my four squirrely monkeys waited our turn as patiently as we could.  But, we made it.  Looks and all, we made it!  Home for lunch and nap and a plan to hit the pool later.

It's only 1:34 pm and I'm already exhausted.  Summer is here.  It will be amazing.  We will just all have to work together to find a routine that helps us all sync with summer (and with each other).  I've reminded my kids several times today that we have ALL summer together and today is only our first day.  So ... they should try to be a little nicer to one another.  I'm going to try to take my own advice as well:)

Here's to your day!  Here's to your changes!  Wishing you luck on whatever road you are traveling.  Remember, 'It's Okay' not to enjoy the whole trip.  It's the wonderful memories made along the way that matter.

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay.'

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Find Your Happy Place!

Last week after receiving a stationary set from a friend, I loved the sayings to much that I have been blogging about them.  The third and final pad of Hallmark stationary featuring Life Is Good quotes could not go unshared ... "Find your happy place."  The other two, "Life is a journey.  Bring comfy shoes." and "The secret to life is enjoying the ride."  Each of these three sayings very much fit the 'It's Okay' philosophy.  We will all continue to struggle through this thing called life.  We will all continue to have moments that are not our finest.  The important thing to remember through difficult times, is that more often than not, things turn out okay.

Life will produce some amazing moments where we stand in awe of the events taking place.  It will also produce moments where we can't comprehend why things are the way they are.  Good times and bad, it's helpful to keep a positive perspective.  It's great to be able to laugh at yourself.  It's critical to find wonderful people to surround yourself with.  It's imperative not to dwell on things that are out of our control.

"Find your happy place."  What is it that gives you comfort?  What in your life brings you peace?  The secret to finding your happy place is to first know yourself inside and out.  Understanding what makes you tick will help you find the things that make you feel as though your days here on earth are successful.

When I was an elementary counselor, one of the strategies I used with my students to manage their emotions was to imagine a place in their mind that relaxed them and made them feel the most happy.  For some it was the comfort of their bedroom, for others it was high up in a tree house.  Many liked to picture the beach or playing a game or swimming in their favorite pool.  The nice thing is that the place they picked was 'theirs'.  They could go to that place at any time- ANY TIME.

I used to share with my students about my 'happy place'.  I almost forgot about it until today as I began this blog.  When I was in high school and used to visit the local YMCA frequently, there was a trail that I used to love to walk or jog on.  It winded down and around this beautiful little creek.  There was a bench that sat under an old over-grown shade tree.  Sometimes I would find myself sitting their and getting lost in the moment.  I'd watch the sunlight bounce off the water streaming over the rocks.  I'd listen to the nature that sang all around me.  I'd feel comfortable in the shade with the slight breeze blowing.  It was so picturesque and perfect.  I don't live in that town any more.  I can't go back to that spot every time I need my happy place, but certainly the memories I have can be visited any time it's needed.

Our mind is a powerful tool.  While we can't live the perfect life, have the perfect family or perfect job; we CAN have the perfect happy place.  This happy place can be visited as often as needed.  It can remind us to stop, relax and take a few deep breaths.  It can remind us that there are perfect moments that do exist in our difficult lives.

Find a place that works for you.  Find people that make you happy and feel loved.  Find a routine that you can live with that makes you feel productive and accomplished.  Find a healthy habit that keeps you strong, both physically and mentally.  Find your spiritual connection that can be fostered with the time and energy you have to give.  Most importantly, find what works for you and then nourish the heck out of it.  That will be a great start to bringing your happy place to your day to day living!

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay.'

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Sorry, Mr. Police Officer

Well, it was a more eventful morning than I would have hoped!  We started out on our walk to school this beautiful morning ... my five-year-old riding her bike, my almost seven-year-old on his scooter, my two-year-old riding in the stroller, and my eight-year-old and her friend walking behind me.  The two on contraptions always go a little faster and know to stop at each street corner.  There is a large turn at the bottom of a hill near our house that I loose sight of them for a minute or two.  It was then that the problem began.

Apparently my bike-riding daughter was feeling the need to 'win' something and announced that she was the champion of the race.  My son knows that they are not to race to avoid accidents and so this comment ticked him off.  I soon found out that there was some shoving and a bike tossed.  My son came to tattle on his sister.  I didn't want to deal with conflicting reports and just announced that they would both walk the rest of the way to school.  End of story.

My son's scooter was folded and put in the bottom of the stroller.  He was very complaint.  My daughter, however, began protesting.  I told her that we were going to continue and that if she did not leave her bike to walk with us I would report to the police officer that usually helps with crossing kids in the morning that she was by herself several blocks away and I might need his help to ensure her safety.  This threat got her catching up quickly.  Which is good because it was a completely empty threat.  I would never admit to an officer that I my daughter refused to come with me and it ended up there wasn't even an officer on duty.

My daughter turned her attitude around quite remarkably.  We had a wonderful walk the rest of the way to school.  So wonderful that I hadn't even turned around to see that her bike was lying on a street corner, right near the street, with her helmet on top. 

We were on our way home after seeing the kids off to school and just about to turn the corner to where we would find her bike so she could ride the rest of the way home.  I noticed an officer turn on the street that we would be turning on.  I joked, "I hope he's not going to see what happened with your bike."  Oh, dear.  I should have never joked.  Talk about karma!

He REALLY WAS going to see what happened with the bike.  There were SEVERAL calls to the police station reporting a bike and helmet left on a corner on the way to school.  After thinking about it, I can see why our neighborly patrons were worried that something had happened.  There could have been an accident or an abduction.  Oh, seriously.  I didn't even think about it.

So, I spent the next several minutes explaining the situation and how both kids lost their chance to 'ride' to school.  I let him know that the scooter fits nicely under the stroller, but I didn't want to carry the bike the half mile to school.  I apologized profusely.  He was really very kind.  He even told a white lie when reporting what he found after investigating the bike ... stating that there was a child who got 'tired' on the way to school and the family picked it up on the way home.

Ugh.  Well, we lived to learn a valuable lesson this morning.  My daughter was a little confused about the lie the officer told.  I let her know that he was being kind to avoid us being more embarrassed than we already were.  Next time, I'll find a better place to park the bike.

It's okay. 

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay.'

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The Secret To Life Is Enjoying The Ride.

Onto my second pad ... last week I told  you about a stationary set I received from a friend.  It is from Hallmark and has Life is Good quotes on each pad.  I loved, loved, loved them all and felt they were very fitting for the 'It's Okay' philosophy.  The first, "Life is a journey. Bring comfy shoes."  And now, "The secret to life is enjoying the ride."

Would you compare life to an amusement park?  Absolutely.  I was once taught a strategy to use with grieving children.  You have them draw an amusement park that represented their grief.  There were rides that were scary in which they wouldn't face alone.  There were rides that they had to do by themselves.  Some rides went up and down and all around; much like the emotions they were faced with in grief.  It was interested to see how the children were able to draw their emotions through that of an amusement park and then explain how it related to their own experience.

After having much success with this strategy, I adapted it for children who struggle with emotion management and self-image.  I found that we are all faced with situations that can be compared to that of an amusement park.  There are times in our life that we take on challenges, only to be disappointed.  There are moments when we would rather be alone, to shamed to share what we are feeling.  There are life situations that are beyond scary in our own world, that need the support of people. 

Whatever challenges you are facing or emotions you are managing, know that you are not alone.  We all struggle through this thing called life.  Some days we are high as a kite and can take on the top-rated roller coaster.  But, there may also be days where all we can handle is a quiet float down the lazy river alone.

Don't be ashamed if your emotions travel up and down and all around.  Don't beat yourself up if you need to ask for help with an overwhelming event you can't face alone.  Don't worry if you look in the mirror some days and feel like you are in the magic image room where you see someone who doesn't look like you.  Try to enjoy the ride you are on.  It may not be the ride your neighbor is willing to brave, but it is the ride that works for you.

Whether you are on a slow moving Ferris Wheel or the fastest upside down Roller Coaster, try to savor what is good about it.  Tomorrow you may have the courage to jump on a more challenging ride or you may need to slow down a bit and see what the amusement park has to offer you.  It's okay to go on a ride alone.  It's okay to gather as many friends as you need to gain support.  It's okay to beg the conductor to stop while you catch your breath.  No two rides are the same.  Many times, no two days are the same.  Certainly, no two lives are the same.  Embrace the journey that is yours and the ride you have chosen for today.

The secret to life is enjoying the ride ... no matter which one you are on!

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

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Life Is A Journey. Bring Comfy Shoes.

I recently received a gift of stationary and sticky notes that had the most amazing Life is Good quotes on them from Hallmark.  The top pad had an adorable pair of old converse-type shoes with the quote, "Life is a journey. Bring comfy shoes."  What a wonderful 'real' quote.  Life is anything but predictable and expected ... some days are amazing and full of joy, while others are daunting and overwhelming.

So we can't be fully prepared for the journey that life often forces us to travel.  That's okay.  Once we accept that, we are able to be more comfortable with the opportunities or challenges that might pop up.  The 'shoe' part of the quote allows us to think hard about who we are.  If we look in our closets at the shoes that are stacked up, we might recall the many journeys that have brought to where we currently are in life.

Comfort is in the eye of the beholder.  As I was enjoying the park and a picnic with my two little ones this morning, I couldn't help but look around.  There was a party of some sort going on at the park with an assortment of parents and little people.  Many of them looked as though they were 'ready' for their day.  Cute outfits, matching shoes, hair done ... and then there was me!  Capri sweatpants, three-year-old plain black flip flops, a black hat (since I got a workout in earlier, but no shower), and a ratty old tank top.

There was a moment when I started to doubt myself.  I started to wonder why I hadn't taken more time to look more presentable.  But, I had to stop.  Differences are what make us who we are.  I am comfortable in the clothes I chose to wear today.  I was able to get a little dirty and not feel bad about it.  I didn't worry that the humidity was 880% and would have destroyed the hair that I so rarely do.  My old flip-flops didn't take any more of a beating than they have the last three years:)

You never know why people are the way they are or why they make the decisions that they make.  It's okay that you do things different.  Your journey is not like any other.  It's okay that your comfort level looks different than someone else.  Shoes are designed to fit the assortment of feet that exist in our world.  Some people are comfortable in high Stilettos, while others can't go without their tennis shoes.

Life is a journey, with roadblocks and detours and four-corner stops.  You have to choose how to handle each of the nuisances that change your world.  You get to decide which shoe will best help you travel the road only you travel.  Try not to wish for the shoes that are on your neighbor.  Chances are, they won't be as comfortable as the ones you already have.  Blisters are no fun and only add to the already challenging journey you are traveling.     

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

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To All The Mother's Out There...

My Dearest Mama's,

I have struggled for days with how to say,
That each of you matter in so many different ways.
I wanted mothers young and old,
To be reminded of the heart their feelings hold.

Mother's here and mothers gone,
Touch us in ways that last our whole life long.
Forgotten, you are never,
Though some days you struggle to see how special.

Motherhood is never easy,
It is a job that never completely pleases.
Worry, guilt, sadness ... feelings that overwhelm,  
We only feel confident to share these with dear friends.

As a mother you will never get it perfect,
But life with you makes it worth it!
Your imprint will last beyond your time,
In the hearts and minds of the little people you call, "mine"!

Don't be ashamed of the hard days you've had,
Don't feel regret for the moments you were beyond mad.
Don't feel that you didn't do it right,
Know that motherhood is a constant fight.

The struggles we fight are often our own,
Never believing we deserve that motherhood throne!
Your love is what matters most,
Not the forgotten library books or the burnt toast.

Though you can't do it all and be it all,
That's not what your children will most recall.
The simple touch, listening ear and boo-boo kiss
Will be what your kids most miss.

Take a moment and think really hard,
About the gifts that only YOU can share with us all.
You're special and different than any other, 
You're YOU, you're an amazing mother!

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

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