#fridayfolly: Is It Possible To NOT Have One?

I rolled out of bed Thursday morning and suffered through the coffee making and 30-minute workout video. As I finished my workout and enjoyed my morning caffeine, I started pondering what my #fridayfolly would be about.

There was about 30 minutes of pure glory ... thinking that I didn't have anything to write about; that maybe I didn't royally screw up this week.

I thought about the two nights I played cards with a kid instead of worrying about the million house things that needed to be done; about the night I laid in bed with my son just enjoying our time together; about the book I started reading again with my nine-year-old that had been on hold the last few months; about my date night with my #3 because of her amazing week; about the loving and fun times I had with my spouse!

For that 30 minutes on Thursday morning, I relished in the joy of my week. I felt proud of my true effort to enjoy as much of my week as I could and to not get caught up in the nuances of day to day living.

Are you wondering what squashed my relishing?

"Honey, do I have any clean underwear?"

Yep. That's right. I lived it up this week. I loved the heck out of the people in my life. I spent the time necessary for growing and nourishing the relationships in my life. BUT ... I failed to do the laundry!

I'd say, it was still a win!

Positive energy really is amazing when you let it drive you. I know that this week's feeling will not last; that life will catch up with me this weekend and you-know-what will hit the fan!

It's okay. I'm okay with the fact that next week may not be as great as this week. But, why have anything less than great days or great weeks? Certainly I could focus on the two mornings I woke up late this week. Or the days that I forgot to take my lunch to work. Or the fact that I was one of the only people who GAINED weight in the biggest loser competition.

Every day has it's challenges. But it's all about the way we view those challenges. It's possible that the stars have all aligned for me this week or my hormones are finally in check. Who really cares why? I just need to remember this feeling and make it last as long as possible and recreate it as often as I can.

There are so many people who in the midst of adversity amaze me. My hubby is someone I am extremely proud of these days. He is willing to take the high road in a difficult situation he is facing. His optimism and go-with-the-flow attitude is one that I wish I could somehow duplicate.

This Friday and as you head into the weekend, my wish for you is appreciation! Take time to appreciate the people in your life. Don't take for granted the fact that you have a home or your health or a family. There are families struggling to get pregnant, fighting to get out of homeless shelters, struggling through major medical conditions. Don't wait for the bottom to fall out in order to appreciate the gifts surrounding you at this very moment!

 Appreciation is a gift that will open your heart & fill your life w/ joy. 

#fosterrelationships #takenothingforgranted #LOVE #lifeisprecious

 

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

 

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#tuesdaytip: Let Your Heart Lead The Way

I sometimes wish I could have met Helen Keller. I adore her quotes and wonder what it would be like to be in the presence of someone who truly had amazing desire, clear vision and an untouchable focus (not to mention the most optimistic view on life)!

My favorite Helen Keller quote: "The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt by the heart."

We must believe in what we are doing, the life we are living and the interactions we are encountering. Our heart must be the center of our actions!

Last week I introduced my latest read, The Energy Bus by Jon Gordon (www.theenergybus.com). The book takes the main character, George, to a city bus driven by Joy. His horrible morning of a flat tire and later finding out that his car would take two weeks to fix allowed him to be transformed by the 'joy' that his bus driver brought him. The flat tire only touched the downhill events that were taking him in the wrong direction and he needed a positive transformation.

The book is based on 10 Rules to Fuel Your Life, Work and Team with Positive Energy. The first rule, discussed last week, was You're The Driver Of Your Bus! It reminded us that we are the only ones who can take our bus where we desire it to go. We must have specific and clear visions for how we are going to get to our desired destination.

So, if we are to take control of our life, envision everything we want to have happen, what is the next step to making it happen?

Rules #2 & #3: Desire, Vision and Focus Move Your Bus in the Right Direction & Fuel Your Ride With Positive Energy

Our bus must be fueled with positive energy in order to maintain our desire, vision and focus. We cannot let the nuances of life block our road or cause us to lose our course.

I had a heavy heart driving to my daughter's basketball game on Sunday evening. I was thinking about a friend who had lost his brother in a car accident. Thoughts were streaming about how unfair it was that this man was taken so abruptly from his loving family.

As my thoughts were swarming, I saw the car in front of me swerve out into the far lane, nearly causing an accident. I had only a split second before I realized why he swerved. There was a very large, metal interstate sign in the middle of the road. I quickly scanned my left and two cars were beside me. My right was occupied by a semi-truck. I could have slammed on my brakes, but that would have done no one any good. I closed my eyes and let the sign slam into the hood of the car, then the windshield and over the back of the van.

A car behind me swerved, the sign landed atop another car ... but no accident occurred. We were all safe and sound. I didn't waste a second wondering if any damage was done to the van. Instead, I spent the remainder of the ride to basketball talking my daughter's ear off- grateful we were both still able to be chatting it up with one another.

Why does bad stuff have to happen in order for us to appreciate what we already have? Why can't we take hold of our lives and appreciate the crap out of every day we are given on this earth?

This Tuesday and every day this week- take the high road. Appreciate your blessings. Dream big. Drive your bus down the road you desire it to go. Stay focused on the really important things in your life and let go of all the rest.

It's okay if you've lost your focus recently. It's okay if your desires haven't been cheery in nature. It's okay if your vision has been taking you in the wrong direction.

Take it all back today. Decide right here and now to focus on what is really important in your life. Waste no more time on the negative and pull up your positive pants! Get back in the saddle (or the bus driving seat) and make your moments the best they can possibly be. Life is too short not to let your heart lead you to your desired destination!

Life is precious & all too short. 

Waste no time on the negativity. 

Focus on good. 

Desire w/ a strong heart. 

Envision your best.

 #takecontrol

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

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#marriagemonday: Are You Asking The Right Questions?

Isn't it funny how a single question can destroy your whole mood or lighten your whole day?

I was reading an article posted by The Huffington Post and it took me directly to a Saturday morning mishap.
The article, The Questions That Will Save Your Relationships, addresses how a simple question like, "How was your day?" can wreak havoc in your marriage, parenting or day to day relationships.

Questions are funny because when they are too broad, they leave you overwhelmed; trying to put all your emotions into a simple sentence. Yet, when they are too direct, they can leave you feeling inadequate and unprepared. There is an art, like most things in life, to asking the proper questions.

Saturday morning I was working out in the front room. It's difficult to squeeze in a workout when the Saturday morning chaos is alive and well. But, I was making it happen. Nineteen minutes into my 30-minute video is when one question destroyed my mood.

"Honey, do you have a list started for the store yet?"

He asked the question so kindly and without judgment. Yet, my emotions went straight to assuming inadequacy. It was Saturday morning. Our weekend was full of events ... wrestling practice, two basketball games, a wrestling tournament and a date night. All great stuff. But, life needed to happen too- cleaning, laundry, store, homework, etc. I SHOULD have had a list started.  

I rolled my eyes (in disgust with myself) and said in a frustrated tone, "No, I haven't started a list yet."

He took it personally and in turn, lashed out with disappointment in the way I was treating him. In his defense, whenever he asks me to get something at the store, I remind him to put it on the list because there is no way it will stick in my brain with the million other things I am trying to keep track of.

I tossed the workout weights down, grabbed the remote and clicked the TV off (slamming it down for effect as well) and stopped the DVD player quite abruptly.

It was a simple question. What the hell was my problem?

Instead of saying calmly to my hubby that I hadn't gotten a chance to make a list yet or think about what was needed at the store, I started beating myself up for not being better prepared (and made him feel like crap in the meantime).

We must weigh our questions heavily before asking and we must take a breath before answering negatively.

There was nothing wrong with his question. However, there was something wrong with the way I answered and the flood of emotions that went with his simple question.

The article I referred to earlier did such a phenomenal job of addressing the emotions that fill our hearts and minds when trying to answer simple questions. What if we were more thoughtful in our questions and more honest in our answers?

This #marriagemonday, concentrate on your questioning. Allow your spouse a chance to answer a question that won't leave him/her feeling overwhelmed. Instead of focusing on a whole day, find out about specific moments. Instead of only allowing a sentence or two for an answer, give time for elaboration. Place less judgment on each other, but also on yourself.

What's something that happened this weekend that made you feel loved by your spouse? Take time to tell him or her.

When was a moment this past weekend that you felt lonely? Share why in the midst of a relationship, you can still feel all alone.

What about your family has made you feel proud recently? Allow that moment to settle in your heart and mind and make sure to share that with the people who made it happen.

My husband I recovered from our morning mishap shortly after it happened ... though it's critical to realize the mishap could have been avoided completely. Asking thoughtful questions is just part of the equation; sharing honestly will give you the complete and correct answer.

I'll leave you with a difficult question to answer (see photo below)! Know there is no judgment in what fills your snapshot and remember my #fridayfolly ... our life is like a canvas. You're encouraged to throw as much color (and emotions into it as you can)! Have an awesome week. Take time to really LOVE those special people in your life- they are too precious to waste a single moment not appreciating the treasures they are!

 Thoughtful questions & honest answers lead to successful relationships. 

#marriagemonday #thinkbeforeyouspeak #sharetotalemotions #taketime

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

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#fridayfolly: Organzied Chaos or Major Cluster?

"Life is like a big canvas. You should throw all the paint on you can."

Author Unknown

I tell you what, our week has been FULL of color! Only as I look back at the picture we painted, I have to laugh and wonder, "Does it look like organized chaos or a major cluster?"

I came home Wednesday evening after teaching religious education. I teach this kindergarten class so that my #3 and I can get a little God in our lives ... a little support for our relationship (if you will!). 

Our #3 had been home sick that day, so I was at class solo. When I walked into the home, it was a little smokey and our sickie was asleep on the couch. Our son had been off at wrestling with a friend, but our other two daughters were wound beyond belief (and beyond hungry since it was already 7:30). 

The alarm then sounded. It wasn't the usual ... when our oven is dirty (that usually only takes a few seconds of fanning the alarm with the towel). I know it's beyond sad that we have a 'usual' way to stop the fire alarm from sounding when our dirty oven gets to smokey! Anyhoo, this was WAY different. 

Sickie was off the couch faster than a speeding bullet and tears immediately began. Our two-year-old started screaming and our oldest daughter tried not to panic (covering her ears and humming). 

As a last resort, the front and back doors were opened to create a flow of air. Mind you, it was below zero temperatures and papers began flying off the counter. 

Minutes after the alarm stopped, our son was dropped off by a friend. He walked in and questioned, "Who was cooking tonight?" Won't it be nice when the weather cooperates and my husband can go back to cooking cheeseburgers on the grill?

Life is a cluster, no matter how you look at it. This cluster looks different for each of us, but reality is ... Life is messy! 

When you look at your life, what do you see? Are you caught up in a cluster or are you able to classify it as organized chaos? 

Surely if we took a step back, if we looked at the amazing pieces of our life canvas, we'd be able to see the beauty. In the moment, it never feels right. We have to wait for the moment to pass before we can recognize how the colors all compliment one another. 

Whatever your chaos, no matter your cluster - take a moment to soak it all in. Note how each event in your life has changed you and made you more beautiful. We are who we are because of the events, people and circumstances that color our canvas. Don't waste time worrying about the brush you choose or creating the perfect masterpiece. Let your creativity flow. Let the chaos be what it is. Embrace the clusters your life is setting before you. 

Have an amazing weekend soaking in the beauty of the life you have been blessed with. Take time to recognize the artist you are and appreciate each talent you bring to the palette!

 Life can be chaotic. It's even a cluster at times. 

Chaos & clusters paint the canvas that is your life.

#fearNOcolor #letyourmasterpieceglow

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

 

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#tuesdaytip: You're the Driver of Your Bus!

I don't know if I've run out of tips to share or if I've found some tips that just can't go unshared! Either way, I've got a new focus for the next 10 Tuesdays!

A friend passed along a wonderful read and after finally diving into it, I realized the important words and message that fit the #tuesdaytip too well. I'm very grateful!

The Energy Bus, is an international bestseller by Jon Gordon. In this amazing read are 10 Rules to Fuel Your Life, Work and Team with Positive Energy.

No matter where you are at in life or what struggles you are facing, this book is applicable. If you like what you read below and want to learn more, visit www.theenergybus.com.

As I began reading about a man who was facing losing his job, his marriage and life as he knew it, I was reminded that we don't have to hit rock bottom to make some positive changes in our lives.

One morning, George (the main character in the book), walked out to a flat tire. This fueled his negative energy and belief that his life was in shambles. He had to take the bus and was greeted by an annoying smiling woman. Her name, of course, was Joy! And boy, oh boy, did her name fit what she offered to George and what her message offers to all of us!

After much coaxing, she convinced George that he should at least listen to her 10 rules for life and see if maybe he couldn't have a turn-a-round in his downward spiral.

Rule #1: You're the Driver of Your Bus!

No matter how much we blame our frustrations, nuances or awful situations on everyone but ourselves, the truth remains that our life is what we make it. We can let life beat us down or we can take control of our life (or our bus) and drive the heck out of it!

We get to make our life what we want. We get to choose how we react to everything going on around us. We get to be the driver. Where will you choose to take your bus?

This is your energy bus. 

You're the diver. 

Did you know you can take your bus anywhere you want to go?

Say yes three times with me. Yes, yes, yes. 

You can take it to the movies, to the beach or the North Pole. 

Just say where you want to go and believe that it will be so. 

Because every journey and ride begins with a desire to go somewhere and do something and if you have a desire then you also have the power to make it happen.

-Taken from The Energy Bus (children's edition)

Monday, January 20th was a day to celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Think back to his desires and his dreams. He had the power to make his vision happen. Though it did not happen over-night or without much despair, his dreams came true.

We won't all change the world with our visions. We probably won't make history or be the main character in a book written in the future ... but, that doesn't mean we can't live big, dream big and envision the very best for our world. 

So, this week, be an amazing driver for your bus. Spread a smile instead of a frown. Take time to think about where you want your bus to go. Whether you're changing diapers or filing tax forms, know your vision for your life; your health; your job; your relationships! If you can envision it, you can make it happen!

I hope you have a great week thinking big. I hope you have people around you cheering you on and wishing you all the best. I hope you believe that you are in control and your bus can take you where you want to go! 

You're the driver of your bus- take control, be amazing & travel great places. 

It's up to you #vision #desire #power http://www.theenergybus.com

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

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#marriagemonday: Try Harder ... That's NOT Funny!

 

Sometimes our spouses think they are being funny- yet, we are just not laughing!

I'm beyond lucky to have a hubby to helps out around the house. He'll pick up my slack if there's an area needing assistance. Yet ... he LOVES to let me know when he's done his fair share. 

The other morning, I may have been a little sensitive or just not in the mood for his shenanigans. Who really knows?

I was putting some dishes in the dishwasher when it began ...

"Oh, do you know how to use the dishwasher? Do you remember how to load the dishes?"

That was just the start. 

I was bringing laundry down and he looks at my son. "I wonder if I should show her how to use the washing machine. It's been so long since she's done a load!"

Are you kidding? I've done every load of laundry the last ten years with the exception of last Thursday. He happened to be home with my son and truly did many, many loads of laundry. This was beyond wonderful- that is, until he rubbed it in my face!

Now, his joking comments were just that. He was trying to be funny. I suppose he should try harder next time!

My point in sharing this is that there are times when jokes and banter are good for the soul. And, then, there are times when we just need to be loved. When the other person isn't laughing, it's not funny!

A huge struggle in marriage is being on the same page at the exact same moment. Whether we are talking about eating healthy or fixing up the house or raising the children ... heck it can even be just making it through the day. 

When spouses aren't in sink with whatever facet of life, feelings can get hurt or emotions can rise. 

Communication is still (and will always be) the key. 

My hubby recognized my lack of enthusiasm for his comments. He looked at me with a pathetic grin and semi-caring look. "Awe, are you sensitive this morning? I'm just giving you a hard time. I'll stop."

And with that, we went on with our day. We must consider the feelings of our spouse (even when they aren't on our page or anywhere close to the pages we are turning). 

This #marriagemonday and throughout this week, take time to notice your spouse's reactions. Communicate in a positive way. Offer support and encouragement. Use less criticism and judgment. We are all guilty of assuming the worst in our better half. Let's use this week, instead, to see what shining stars we chose to wed!  

Take time to recognize how your spouse is feeling. 

Notice how your words impact him/her. 

Be willing to change your tune! 

#consideremotions

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

 

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#fridayfolly: The Laundry Can Wait

What's important to you? How do we begin to prioritize the million and one things in life that have to get done in order to live successfully?

At some point, we have to be able to understand what really matters ... I believe it's the relationships that really matter and everything else should be able to wait.

Now, surely, this is easier said than done.

Sunday night as I sat in the ER with my sister and my dad, I heard my mom (the patient) say what I thought was ridiculous at the time. "Well, I guess the laundry isn't going to get done today!"

In my mind, I couldn't wrap my brain around the fact that my mom was worried about the laundry, when we were just glad she was still on this earth able to complain about the undone household task.

Yet, I'm no better than her. Maybe the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.

I find myself worried about the silliest things- thinking that if they don't get done, somehow my life will stop turning. This isn't true. At all.

We must seek to let go of some of the nuances that get in the way of us truly enjoying the people around us.

I came home tonight after a very long day- only to find our house immaculate and the laundry completely done. My hubby was home with a sick boy today and he out-did himself! I'm beyond grateful to not have to worry about minor household tasks that would have had to be done this weekend- and now I can just enjoy!

As you approach your weekend (hopefully a 3-day one at that!), try to let go of some of the things that can wait. Seek to appreciate and enjoy the people around you. Life is too short to worry if the laundry is going to get done (again, easier for me to say since ours is already complete)!

Our week is coming to a close. Surely there were follies in all of our days. Inevitably we've made mistakes that we can't take back. It's okay! Let go of the error and embrace love! Love not only those surrounding you, but please also don't forget to LOVE numero uno; number one; YOU! 

What are your priorities? 

Pick the people in your life & forget everything else! 

Do what you absolutely have to & #leavetherestfortomorrow!

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'. 

 

Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!

 

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