#MarriageMonday: Why Are You Acting Like a Child?

You might assume that my title is referring to my husband! I often get asked what it's like to raise five kids instead of four (he is such a fun-loving soul that he gets mistaken for a child). However, when I ask, "Why are you acting like a child?", I am referring NOT to him, BUT TO ME!

Yes, ME!

There are moments in our marriage when I act like anything but an adult. Full-blown, stomping my feet, tantrums.

I've blogged and written several stories about the difficult times in my parenting. The 'real' times when I feel as small as a pea. The moments when I have been yelled at, hit, or been embarrassed beyond belief.

The other day it occurred to me . . . they act just like I do. YIKES!

My husband went fishing last week. The kids really did quite well. There was a moment though, on Saturday afternoon before he got home that my seven-year-old had a major melt-down. The kind of melt-down that makes you run through the house making sure all the windows and doors are closed so no one else knows just how crazy your house can get! It ended with, "I wish you weren't even here. I WANT DAD!"

It occurred to me that her screaming, hitting, throwing, etc. was her way of saying, "I miss dad."

For years after my husband would return home from his week-long trip, I would find myself being crabby, more silent and very difficult to be around. I couldn't explain why I acted like I did and I certainly didn't like my behavior. I just couldn't get myself to stop.

I realized as I was watching my struggling child- my behavior was like that because I had missed my husband and worried about his safe return. All that pent up emotion was released- just not in the loving way I had hoped. All those years I acted just like a young child trying to express my big emotions.

When words are not expressed, behavior is a sure way to share our emotions. Most times, though, the behavior is not favorable.

Marriage is at it's best when words are shared often and honestly. Marriage is most successful when we communicate in positive ways. Marriage will win if forgiveness is given freely for the times we fail to 'use our words'.

Thank goodness for forgiveness! I am one lucky lady. My childish antics wouldn't be tolerated by many . . . though I can't say it's all bad that I was acting like the child pictured. We are certainly more alike than I would have ever cared to admit. Turns out she and I both have a large part of her daddy's heart!

This week look deep into your marriage. When do you struggle to be the spouse you want to be? What words are difficult for you to share? What behaviors are you hoping to improve?

Keep fighting the good fight. Great marriages don't just happen. Put in the work. Put in the time. And, don't forget- put in the words!

#MarriageMonday

Childish behaviors happen when #words are missing #communicate

We all mess-up #forgiveoften

#GreatMarriage= #talk #actinlove

 

Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'.  
 

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