Tuesday, March 19, 2013

It's Okay to be Frustrated!

After embracing the idea that frustration is a normal part of life, I can begin to deal with feelings more appropriately.  You would think after almost 35 years of life that I would have the coping strategies necessary to deal with the challenges that life throws at me daily.  I don't even have to any major challenges, which makes me feel even more inadequate.

Why do we do this to ourselves?  Beat ourselves up for the very emotions that make us who we are are.  I am blessed beyond ways that I could possibly count.  I have more goodness in my life than I deserve.  With that being said, it is still okay for me to be frustrated.  It is still okay for me to lose it occasionally.  It is still okay for me to forget to count my blessings in those moments so that I can later be reminded of how many I really have.

The other day I started working out again.  I am actually excited about my readiness to embrace 'healthy' again.  I can't look back and say that I should have been doing this longer, I just need to be thankful for the fact that I am doing it now.  So the following story will hopefully help you let go of some ridiculous frustration you are having at this moment in your life!

I got up and got my four children ready.  I sent two of them off to school and then headed to the local YMCA.  I was going to go to my first exercise class, so the two little ones would be in daycare for an hour.  This was a little difficult (I had to get over the fact that it was okay to be staying at home, but still use daycare so that I could be healthy), but I knew it was time to get myself back in shape.

After a gloriously difficult workout I went to pick up my two little ones.  I am leaving out the fact that my one-year-old threw the fit of her life when I left her, because she hasn't been away from me much.  I picked the kids up still alive and doing well.  I had to stop at the front desk to get new ID cards.  They did great until the moment we were about to leave.

It was then that I started regretting the decision to workout.  My four-year-old hit her sister.  I calmly let her know that she lost part of her allowance (this is our newest parenting strategy) and the little girl lost it.  She wouldn't follow me out and stood just outside of the door.  I didn't want to deal with her so I just kept walking.  This was apparently NOT what she wanted, so she ran full speed and pushed me with all her might.  I tripped a little, but was bound and determined to get to the car.  Getting in the car was a struggle and having her buckle-up was even more challenging.  So ... I started to drive.  The police station was a block away.  I let her know I would be stopping.  Seriously????  What was I going to do at the police station?  Long story short, she got buckled after we were parked at the station for about three minutes.  We made it home only to have the fit continue.  After room time and a major adult temper tantrum, it ended.

Throughout this time, I was beating myself up for working out.  My frustration was beyond what I can express.  It took me many hours to see that I had created a major positive change for myself by choosing to workout, but that I hadn't given my children a chance to catch up with the change I was making.  While I am trying to get into a routine, I also need to allow my kids a chance to establish what this routine is going to look like.  I should workout.  I can be frustrated.  But ... it's okay that things didn't go perfect on the first day.   

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