At these moments, you look around. You're looking for someone to laugh with you or you're making sure no one saw your ridiculous mistake.
At our most embarrassing moments, we hope someone we trust and love is nearby. Usually they lessen the shame and lighten the humiliation.
Laughing at our mistakes is sure to make them better. BUT, what about those times when your spouse is laughing at your mistake? What about the times your prince charming doesn't lessen the shame or lighten the humiliation ... what about the times he creates them?
Let's go back about eleven years now. I was helping my then fiance move a very heavy mattress down a very skinny and very windy staircase. For some reason, I was in the lead- meaning I was heading DOWN the very skinny and windy staircase with the very heavy mattress pressing down on my every step.
The mattress was stuck. My arms were like jello. I think (or at least hope), that my wonderful prince charming thought I had given up and set the mattress down. There had been several swear words shared between us; I was NOT happy that he hadn't thought about putting himself at the bottom of the staircase with the weight of the mattress pressing down.
I heard some sort of muffled, angry saying and then the next thing I knew, I was on the floor at the bottom of the stairs with the mattress on top of me. My soon-to-be husband had gotten so fed up that he kicked the mattress in an effort to get it around the bend (in his defense, he was trying to get it around the corner and claims he didn't think I was there or that the mattress would ever budge ... we will never really know!).
Now, I wasn't physically hurt (my pride was a little lost) and I'm sure I was a sight for sore eyes ... but the ASS laughed at me. He stood there and cracked up.
I was so angry. I wanted to jump up and punch him in the gut- only the weight of the mattress and my position on the floor wouldn't allow it. It took a LONG time for me to get a good laugh out of this experience, but every time we look back I can't help but bust a gut.
Almost ten married years later- we know better than to move things together. We often refer back to that moment at the bottom of the stairs and I can bring out my best guilt trip over his ridiculous behavior.
Today, though, we were painting and rearranging in two kiddos rooms. We had to deposit an under-bed set of drawers to the garage. We had to go down the stairs in order to get there. He PURPOSEFULLY put me going down first. He LAUGHED his butt off as he pretended to readjust, nudge or jab the drawers at me. He had no intention of repeating the mattress trick, but made every effort to act like he would.
We made it down the stairs and out to the garage without me throwing the drawers at him. We managed to make it through a difficult day of distracting the kids so we could work. We made it ... and we even got in a laugh!
My question: "Is it okay to laugh?"
My answer: "Absolutely."
Without the laughter, all that comes is anger and resentment. Without the giggles and past mockeries, we get stuck in the monotony of life and marriage.
Who do you want around when you make a fool of yourself? I hope it's your spouse! I know mine can be quite obnoxious, but he sure knows how to have a good time and a darn good laugh (plus he knows how to distract the attention off my ridiculous acts ... especially ones involving geography ... but that's a whole other story)!
This #marriagemonday, find a time in your married past that laughter made what could have a been a very embarrassing, humiliating or shameful situation a little bit better. Remember that moment, talk about that moment and then share a laugh about that moment. You'll be glad you did:)
Enjoy the journey you have been blessed with, love the people in your life, smile :) and remember, 'It's Okay'.
Visit www.itsokaybooks.com to learn more!
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